My life is dull.
and dried up like the sound.
“What ifs” always flood my mind, so much Im amazed its not leaking out of my ears onto my shirt; which would suck for its charlies and im pretty sure what ifs would stain.
So what exactly are whatifs?
Whatifs are these itty bitty hopes and dreams we rarely share with our friends, we keep them to ourselves in hopes that one day our whatifs will become reality.
Heres a whatif for you.
Whatif emotions are just in our minds?
Such as there is no such thing as happy/mad/sad/excited.
Its just our brains saying feel this way because that’s what your suppose to feel?
Maybe weve been so impacted by soap operas and the trashy tabloads since we came to this earth that we don’t even know what real emotions are.
Im scared to continue writting because im worried with each word that drys and slowly peels away like chipped paint that the next word rolling off the tip of my tongue will sound even more dimwitted then the last sentence I just finished. And seeing that If I wrote this in ink im guessing that the period of the last sentence I just finished wouldn’t even be dried by now, I would be found an imbassole. Im amazed Microsoft word hasn’t kicked me off yet for all the completely and awfully misspelled words you see.
Anyways school is tomorrow, no matter what.
My stomach aches just thinking about the outcome of tomorrow’s conference….
So what does that mean?
Am I nervous?
Scared?
Worried?
Maybe even excited?? Would that make me sick?
Now im going to switch channels for a bit, but I swear I will return you to your scheduled program shortly.
My dad handed me a book tonight, fully knowing that theres a good chance it would just be added to the already high stack of thickly dust covered novels awaiting my attention atop of the landing next to my laptop, which is my one and only true love, who awaits our 3 hour ronda vue, which has become routine ever since I got this time stealing contraption back . The black printed words inside the cover of the book which read “” contains the most frequent asked questions asked by first year college students. One of my first questions which popped faster then my moms popcorn in the microwave into my danty pee sized mind was why do all books print there text in black? Thrill me, why not black pages and white writing? Hmmmm…. Second question: does this man know my current gpa? Ha. Sadly enough he did. So I looked at him, is he dumb or just being cruel. He must know I cant get into a major university with my messily 2.9.